Today, she continues breaking the fourth wall. Let’s see if the date takes a turn for the better!
Wildfire: This is where we were last. Did you want to see me go through each one? Well, guess what? Not happening. The same thing pretty much happens, anyway.
Wildfire: See? He has, like, butter fingers.
Wildfire: You lost it a long time ago, buster.
Wildfire: Blah blah blah – has a gift, whoop-de-doo. Let’s jump ahead, why don’t we?
Wildfire: We lie on the grass, make out, go home. The end.
Chase: You made that really short, Wildfire.
Wildfire: Was that supposed to be your idea of a good time? If you want me to stick around longer, then don’t be such a bore.
Wildfire: Now, let’s see what a date with Arsenik is like.
Arsenik: You do realize I’m not interested in you, don’t you, Valkyrie?
Wildfire: Oh, too late. You’re up, lover boy.
Wildfire: I’m smacking you with the roses.
Arsenik: Such a violent person like you doesn’t deserve them.
Wildfire: You sure? That’s not what you’re saying here. You’re just asking to get smacked.
Arsenik: When taken out of context. Either way, these are words meant for another lady’s ears. You’re like some sort of parasite, taking over someone else’s body.
Wildfire: Oh, what was that? Sounds like you’re talkin’ to me.
Arsenik: I didn’t realize you were this desperate for my attention, Miss Wildfire. Come, allow me to humor you.
Chase: You, what are you planning on doing to her?
Wildfire: Chase, go away. Our dating thing’s done.
Arsenik: I only mean to show her what it means to be with me. I don’t believe she knows how to handle a man.
Wildfire: You wanna bet, boy?
Chase: Okay, let’s end the date.
Chase: How did we end up here?!
Arsenik: Let me handle it.
Arsenik: There. Now, let’s end it here.
Wildfire: Oh, couldn’t please me all night long after all?
Arsenik: Rather, I would say you couldn’t please me.
Chase: No one’s pleasing anybody!
Wildfire: You better kiss me, you fool.
Arsenik: I think it would take a fool to kiss you.
Arsenik: I don’t see your face, Valkyrie, do you? Didn’t I tell you? Parasite.
Chase: Who are you calling a parasite?
Wildfire: I can talk for myself, thank you very much, Chase.
Arsenik: All right. Now, we’re truly done here.
Wildfire: We sure are. You were as boring as I thought you were.
Arsenik: Really? You only sound disappointed because I wouldn’t let you have your way.
Chase: OKAY. WE’RE DONE HERE.
That ends Wildfire’s run-through of War: Valentine Edition. What’s next? Find out by following Dreamgazer on tumblr or twitter. If there’s a specific game you want the cast to play, feel free to shoot a message! All feedback’s welcome.